Saturday, February 13, 2010


I miss my crazy neighbors. 

Neighbor #1.  Annie and Jane were awesome drunks. They were constantly falling down the 20 stairs leading to their apartment above ours. We would wake to find loose change, chapstick and sometimes even a bloody Annie outside our door.

Neighbor #2.  Mary was collecting her mail when she was randomly punched in the face by a girl she didn't know. I guess I don't really miss my neighbor but the random punching girl.

Neighbor #3.  I had a weird feeling that someone was living in our building's utility closet.  My suspicion was confirmed when I came home and saw smoking seeping out of the bottom of the door.  My landlord and boyfriend knocked on "their" door, but there was no answer.  After they kicked in the door I found out I was wrong, there were 2 people living in our utility closet.  We offered to bring them to a shelter, but the woman said she was stabbed in a shelter a month ago. 

Neighbor #4.  Meth Girl.  I am pretty sure she was a meth head.  We would constantly hear her scream at her boyfriend and food delivery men.  "You forgot my mother fucking coke.  Fuck you!"  I awoke at 3am because there was a weird flash coming from outside.  I looked out the window to find Meth Girl having a photo shoot of herself on our porch.  She also left her door wide open one day and was shocked to find someone stolen her bike.  So she installed obviously fake cameras outside her doors.  I think she may have gone to jail or just disappeared.  Her friend ended up squatting at her place.  He eventually stabbed my other neigherbor in the leg.  Good times.

My current neighbors are very boring. I guess my neighborhood has changed.

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